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Home Shopping poor replacement for sports
Bill Wright
Sports Columnist
“So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that’s on the worst day of my life.” Now, like the hypnotherapist in Office Space, you might be inclined to say “Wow. That’s messed up.” But for so many sports fans, replace “cubicle” with “easy chair” and “I started working” with “the Super Bowl,” and you’d have their collective melodramatic sentiment for the next two weeks, until pitchers and catchers report for Spring Training.
Granted, here in Cleveland at least the Cavaliers are not a total waste this February. Instead of figuring out how far ahead they are for the best lottery odds, Cavs fans are actually calculating how many games the team is out of a playoff spot. Nonetheless, February games in the seemingly never ending seasons of the NBA and NHL can provide only mild entertainment.
In these dire times, at least the temperatures approached a relatively balmy forty degrees early this week. This meteorological development has happily enabled me to take out my baseball glove and inhale deeply the sweet scent of dirt, sweat, and leather. Prior to last weekend, this was impossible because the artic temperatures had frozen my nose. I have even regained enough feeling in my fingers to grip a baseball and pound it into my mitt. So I’ve got that going for me. Which is nice.
Perhaps this lull in the sporting world is somehow deviously contrived by the significant others of sports-crazed fanatics. Valentine’s Day conveniently falls smack in the middle of the Month of the Sporting Dead. Instead of having a wide range of interesting sports on TV, we are forced to flip channels, endlessly searching for something, anything to watch.
At some point about a week into this month, the NFL Yearbook of the Arizona Cardinals becomes an attractive option. And as we flip, we make the mistake of not skipping the Home Shopping Network. Now, these same significant others are nearby, exclaiming, “Wait, go back! What were those pretzels doing?” (We soon discover that, “Ohhh … they are looking tasty.” How we long for just one more Green Bay Bengals game!)
But fear not, sports fans. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. By the end of the month, Spring Training will be in full swing in Florida and Arizona, when every team’s a contender. (Except the Tigers, the Ivan Rodriguez signing notwithstanding.) March will bring college basketball madness, increased talk of the NFL Draft, basketball and hockey games of more meaning, and New Englanders forgetting their second Super Bowl victory in three years, instead choosing to whine about the inferiority of the Red Sox. It was around the same time Boston last won the World Series that St. Paul wrote his letter to the Corinthians, asserting that “Love is patient.” So must those who love sports be.
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Home Shopping poor replacement for sports
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